I love to be close to my son and hold him as much as possible, but yes it is very tiring at times, I will be honest. I am an advocate of baby wearing though. Also, even though I do encourage that.. I formula feed my son and he co-sleeps with us. I’m not militant about certain issues. People have different ways of raising their children. I do understand that.

My view is though, babies are only little for so long. I want to enjoy my time with my son rocking him, holding him, bouncing him, etc., for as long as possible. When he is a certain age, I will no longer be able to do that with him. I want to take advantage of every sweet moment like that. There is just something to be said about having your children be close to you like that. It’s wonderful. Also, I love going everywhere with my baby and my husband. We do things as a family. I do not see it as being selfish. I see it as spending time with my family. You can’t not bring your child somewhere because you’re worried they are not going to have a good time. That’s called letting your child control your life. There are things your children are going to hate doing. It’s part of life. There are places I don’t necessarily enjoy going to with my husband.. for example: the guitar shop, but guess what.. I go anyway and at least we can be together and enjoy good conversation. So, that’s my take on things.

too many people other their associate one thing with another and another and all of a sudden we are hashing out everyones personal parenting styles and judging people inapropraitely.

I have known lots of babywears that also do not co-sleep, do not have toddlers needing them to sleep, give their children baby ceral at 4 months and don’t believe in spanking.

I have known non babywears who nurse until their kids are 18 months, don’t co-sleep, have shy children etc

I have known families that cart thei kids in a carseat until they are bigger and then baby wear and co sleep and do cloth diapers and spank, wean at 12 months and don’t vax.

My point being that every family has different combinations for what they do, what works for them, what works for each child. I could go on and on with different combinations of a gazillion things.

We all have personal beliefs that lead us to some of the decisions we make and we all have personal opions that helps formulate these decisions.

I am not judging the mom who formula feeds into now being an emotionless mother who doesn’t take care of the needs of her child- thats ridiculous! although there are some moms out there who do not meet their childrens needs that doesn’t meen that I should stereotype them down to one decision.

Likewise I do not think that anyone should judge say myself, who takes her 4- soon to be 5 children under 7 with her everywhere she goes with the 15 month old onher back in a wrap. does that now mean that I am the lady who walks through walmart with screaming kids running wildly around dirupting the peace and causing havoc as I ignore them to talk to my friend about home decorating- NO that would be ridiculous as well. even though there are some families that do have those problems regardless of how many kids they have (by the way those are not my child who are very respectful and obedient, hold they cart, help me find what we need with their eyes and are respectful and kind to those that we see- I am happy to say I am always complimented on how welbehaved my kids are and how happy the baby is on my back)

My point being that it would serve us all well to remember that we will hear about extreams sistuation, hard sistuations, difficult sistuation in many families.

It would be hard for me personally to have to sit with my 3 1/2 year old every night for an hour or so to get her to go to sleep. However to the “mom next door” that may be her favorite time of the day with that particular child.
That doesn’t make me a bad parent for not doing it or her a bad parent for doing it. It doesn’t make her way right or wrong or my way right or wrong.

I personally think it is great that Gwen in holding her baby and Gavin as well. I also agree with a previous pp that they are not wearing their baby carriers correctly and I hope that gets fixed. I am sure they have a nanny to help them and am encouraged to see that they are taking a proactive role in their sons life. And on that note I am a personal believer in the benefits to babywearing. Calling yourself a baby wearer doesn’t mean that you have to have your child on you all the time- you can choose too but you don’t have to. And most people who do wear these “more traditional” carriers (things other than a bjorn and a snuggli or a framed back pack)wear them as needed or as their children need it.
I wear my youngest when we are out and only put my three year old in the stroller/shopping cart as needed if not everyone is walking but the babe on me. I wear my children more in the house when they are younger as their needs are different- not that my youngest is 15 months he hardly ever is worn in the home becuase the need in not there. But should it arise (as it did the other night while trying to set the table with a teething baby crying at my feet) I popped him up on my back and he was instantly soothed and happy and 15 minutes later I put him back down and he toddled off to play. There was a need to be close to mom- the need was filled and when the need was no longer there we were good!

I am sorry this is sooooo long but I am hoping to bring people into the right perspective. We are not here to bash eachother so please remember while we all have out different ways of doing things that we should stay understanding that everyone does things differently.

And on my last note the only view I really condem is the narrow minded ones that say there are no benefits to baby wearing or that we are regressing in our society by doing so- To these skeptics I say do your homework because scientific studies prove otherwise.

So happy parenting to all you families and your different ways of doingthings- we may not all agrea on every point but we can all agree to disagree and throw out what doesn’t work for our families and keep what does. Being able to glean from eachother the pearls of wisdom that otherwise we may not have known…Mind Bare
http://www.wraphappy.com

As far as a 3 year old needing held to go to sleep- it makes it tough but it doesn’t last forever. She will soon be so independent and I’m sure your sister and her daughter will cherish those moments forever. ‘Spoiling children’ is not from giving them love and support, it from giving in to every want like toys and material things. You can still hold, touch and show love and respect without letting them walk all over you. When talking about spoiling with other things it’s when you leave it on a shelf untouched. ;)

Stop getting your new age Mom jeans in a knot and try respecting others opinions as well! ;-)

With Love

Is this how you are going to teach your child?

If their opinion is different than yours are you going to label them as “ignorant” or “ridiculous”? Are these the same women who claim to nuture their children so? Doesn’t sound very nurturing to me.

Stop getting your surburban mom jeans in a knot and respect other people’s opinions!

I am not this monster that everyone has described me as. Like you said, this is a forum, where viewpoints are shared. For everyone to jump on me shows not my ignorance, but theirs. Like I said, a sling if fine sometimes, but I don’t agree with bringing children to inapporiate places. I understand that people get defensive, but if you don’t bring your child to the nail salons, etc, this doesn’t apply to you. If you got angry, then yes, you might have brought your children to dumb places or why else would you get mad? My mother never had a babysitter btw, she could not afford it. But she had something that some mothers don’t have nowadays, and I said some, and that is good sense. She raised me with love and discipline. Never did I throw a tantrum in a public place etc. Kids need to love their parents, but to fear them as well. I am against physical discipline, but I believe in respect.

And I happen to love the Supernanny. She gives real adive that a lot of middle class spoiled woman could use! Stop letting your kids run the show and get a backbone.
Good advice to me.

With all the hateful crimes going on in the world with criminals that seem to have no feeling for the victims they hurt, it’s amazing to me that so many still try and teach their children they are on their own and need independence as early as possilbe. Love and nurturing breeds love and nurturing. I teach my children I care about them and their feelings are important and someday they will do the same with others.

These parents spending time with their children know what this is all about and their children will thive because of it. I hope more parents will find out the benefits because of this, but hopefully learn a couple easy steps to make it comfy and safe. There are plenty of good resources out there- some were mentioned already.